Gosh...this is boring!

Well, hello there skinny friends.  No, I did not die working out or anything. I did cause some bodily harm, however.  Today is the beginning of week 2 with no job.  I did great last week with my working out and eating healthy routine.  On Monday, Wednesday and Friday I went straight to the gym after taking the kids to school.  I ran between between a half mile and a mile and a half each day and lifted weights.  Then on Tuesday, I did the Yoga/Pilates routine that I wrote during my last day at work.  Yeah...this is boring me to write so I can only imagine how you readers must feel.

Anyway...I worked out hard and long and tried to limit my calories.  I lost five pounds!  Which I would be more excited about if I wouldn't have gained back 8 prior to the work out week.

Today I have not worked out but I WILL!

Grace is loving basketball, so today I will get her membership card.  Then we will run together and she can practice her lay-ups while I lift weights.  Only two weeks into the month and I am at half my weight loss goal.  I need to be atleast 10 pounds lighter by the end of this month and I know I can do it.

Lent starts next week, thus I will not consume any alcohol (with the exception of St. Patty's day).  I think this will help immensley with my weight loss goal.

More good news to report tomorrow. Now must search the interwebs for a healthy, cheap dinner recipe.

I'm a Spoiled Brat! BUT...I Found a Temporary Solution

Journaling every morsel that crosses my lips has been a great way to keep within my daily caloric intake. Scratch that. Actually journaling every morsel that crosses my lips would be a great way to keep within my daily caloric intake. In my mixed of mind of dieting, food only counts if it is during the work week and before 9pm. My weight is holding steady at 173 which is a total of 7 pounds down. Somehow I have to figure out how to lose 3 more pounds this week in order to reach my goal for the month. Hmmm....how could I do this? I could starve myself until Sunday and then spend all day Monday stuffing my face. I could skip work the rest of the week and spend 8 hours a day at the gym really working out. Or, I could just face the fact that I've failed yet again this month of reaching my goal and rejoice in the 7 pounds that I did lose. As I seem to have no willpower when it comes to crab legs and beer, the quest for a new dieting/weight loss approach is on.


I never had a problem with my weight until recently. Until my sophomore year in college, I could not participate blood drive dontations. The minimum weight requirement was 110 pounds. I didn't reach 110 until I discovered beer and dorm room food....and it still took me a year to get there. Now realistically looking back at those pictures, I was grossly skinny. But I ate whatever I wanted and did whatever I wanted. If I wanted to be lazy with an entire pizza, a carton of rocky road ice cream and a 6-pack of Natty Lite, more power to me. I'd wake up the next day and could have quite possibly lost weight.

I really don't know what to do to shed these extra pounds. I want to eat yummy food and my husband is an amazing cook. I want to have a few cocktails with friends every Wednesday night. I want to eat pizza and watch a movie with my kiddos on Friday evenings. I want to continue the crab leg and wine fest we've been having every Saturday night since the new year. I want to lose weight. Even with the measly 7 pounds I've lost, I notice a difference in the way my clothes fit. But somehow I need to turn that 7 pounds into 30 pounds...and by June 1st.

As I contemplate how I could have all of my bad habits 10 years ago and never gain a pound, I realize that I'm 10 years older and have birthed 3 kids and maybe, just maybe my metabolism has haulted I was always on the go. My class schedule had me in a power-walk up and down hills across campus several times a day to be on time. My job had me running cocktails and steaks to impatient diners. Come that time when I could eat, even though I ate crappy, fattening food, I had already burned a ton of calories.

Now, I sit. Right here in front of this computer screen. Eight hours a day. Then I sit some more...in the car, at practices and games, while paying bills, and watching T.V. Sedentary.

Solution: I quit my job!

Yeah...in hindsight it probably wasn't the best financial decision I have ever made for my family. When at home all day with my kids, sitting is rarely an option. Plus, no more splurges on food because we're gonna be flat broke! But, if it makes me skinny then who the hell cares!

Little by little

I've lost 7 pounds!  Small success but it feels good.  I have been a very bad girl though on the weekends.  Monday through Thursday I can stick to eating between 1200 and 1500 calories.  But come Friday, its no holds bar.  Crab legs and butter.  Tutto Mare with extra cream sauce.  A few too many cocktails.  Oh man, it feels good to splurge.  And I still managed to lose 7 pounds in 2 weeks.

So, with the looming unemployment ahead...my mission is to cook fabulously but healthy, hit the gym every morning after taking the kids to school and be as active as possible.

I am strong.  I am woman.  And I'm gonna rock this world.

Now, can I get up off the couch and turn off the food network?????

Maybe in a few more minutes.

Slacker Success

If you skip working out two days in a row, does it mean your a failure?  I'm going to say no but maybe I'm being too nice to myself.  Thursday St. Louis was hit with a nasty snow storm.  All area schools were closed as well as many businesses.  Of course, my place of work wasn't.  By the end of the day, I just didn't want to be out in it anymore and came home after work instead of hitting the gym.  I told myself that I was going to do yoga later that evening and even came as far as putting on my workout clothes and getting out the DVD.  But then, I just didn't do it.

Friday rolled around and I was committed to going to work out straight from work.  But when quitting time rolled around, my head was pounding.  So guess what?  No exercising for me. 

What a slacker! 

There's really no reason that I shouldn't have worked out but pure laziness.  If I don't go to the gym immediately after work, I'm just not going to go.  No matter how many times I plan to get up in go in the morning, it just ain't happening.  This girl just cannot get out of the warmth of my bed to freeze my butt off on the way to work out.  There's just no way.

But in better news.  In those two days I did stick to my daily calorie intake.  Actually, I was way under on Thursday....which I think contributed to the headache on Friday.

Tonight is the big football game for my house.  And you know what that means....beer and bad food.  I'm really craving some king crab legs and Blue Moon.  Knowing that tonight would be tempting, I ate a piece of toast for breakfast and lunch and plan to have a clementine later for a snack.  This way I have saved room for some extra "beer calories" tonight. 

I'm not even sure if I can technically do that....but what the hell!  I'm making up this dieting stuff as I go along anyway!  I'll find what works for me.

The Post in Which I Whine

Damn!  I want a cigarette and beer after that workout.  This dieting and exercising stuff is Haarrdd!

I tried out Taco Bell's new Drive-Thru Diet menu today because I was so hungry.  SO HUNGRY!  Even though I already ate a peanut butter sandwich and a clementine two hours earlier.  I ordered the Fresco Burrito Supreme--Chicken.  It was actually really, really good.  But that might be because it was really, really bad for me.  I definitely should have checked out the nutritional information before ordering.  But then, I don't eat a lot of fast food so I don't have much to compare it to.  Is 340 calories alot for a burrito?  I mean 1410 mg of sodium seems like a lot, but is it?  The 8 grams of fat isn't bad, right?

Ahhh....This is all so confusing.

Here's my progress thus far.... I have not smoked or drank in 3 days!  In those 3 days, I stretched my body, mind and soul in yoga and kicked my own ass in cardio.  I lost 4 pounds, gained 2 back over the holidays and I'm anxiously awaiting seeing more and more melt away. 

The new season of Biggest Loser premiered last night, and it's the first season I've decided to TiVo.  Some of the contestents broke my heart and made me feel better about myself at the same time.  It was inspiring and discouraging.  Why can't I lose 25 pounds in 1 week?  Then I'd be done with all this torture in 2 weeks and back to my old self. 

So, I'm waffling right now.  I need some encouragement, inspiration or just a swift kick in ass.  Anyone out there willing to help????

Never Again in 2010

Once upon a time in a not so distant past, there was a skinny girl.  So skinny, in fact, that her friends in high school once approached her about anorexia.  This girl certainly did not have an eating disorder.  She was just skinny.  Good genetics she thought.  Over the course of the years, this girl birthed three children, changed jobs five times, seperated from her husband and then reunited, lost everything financially and gained 50 pounds.  Through struggles with anxiety and depression her weight teeter-tottered for many years.  Two years ago, this girl was in the best health of her life and today she is the heaviest she has ever been. This journal is designed to help this girl find her inner skinny and herself along the way.  Please join me in my journey to a balanced life and a happy me.

The first picture is from 2008 and is where I want to be.  The second picture is present day.  Wow!  Seeing those two pictures side by side.....I'm at a loss for words. 

So, today is day one!

Who's with me in this challenge to find my inner skinny?